My Life in Blog Form: 22/06/2025

Hey!

So, June...

It's a love hate relationship.

Mid June is fathers day and the end of June is my birthday!

This month has been really hard. Mentally and physically. I have been exhausted. I think because my mind has been so busy and I've wanted to escape feeling so low and useless, so, I have been overworking. Don't get me wrong I absolutely love my job but I have been putting 100% into it when I only have about 40% to give. I just need a break and some time to write some poetry.

I've had the last 3 days off and it's been awesome and so busy but my body is saying 'hang on a minute, I thought we needed to rest!'

On Friday I went to Kettering with Kieran's sister, Keeley, she's going off to college and I am super proud of her, then in the evening I went to Leicester with Abi and performed a really really sad poem that I'd written about my parents and life. It was emotional but I knew it needed to be done and get off my chest. I feel a thousand times better now and it was so lovely to be with everyone. I have not posted this poem on the blog, I possibly never will. It was my longest, saddest but most honest. I got home about 1 AM, then was up at 7:30 AM to pop into work and do some fire testing, spent a few hours revising for the theory test then helped a colleague with a PT course circuit class. After that I heard that there was an even at the park and I swung by just as poetry had started which was so lovely, I spoke to the performer Quinton afterwards and we have him booked in as a feature for Rushden Rhymes. Then Prince, the organiser asked me to perform an impromptu set which I agreed to. I ran out of business cards and made loads of contacts which is awesome! A few hours later I ended up in the pub for pride and got back at midnight.

It's Sunday morning now. I got to sleep most of this morning and I am tired but couldn't turn down all these opportunities. I had 2 days of poetry and there might not have been much written but it has fuelled my love for creativity and reminded me that this is what I want to do in life. 

I want to feel every emotion and every bit of life that I am given. I want to never be numb or miss out on opportunities.

I want to live.